You may recognise Tomas Skoloudik from international fashion campaigns by Gucci, D&G, Armani, and Gap – but it wasn’t always high-flying for the Czech model. Although he was always a natural in front of the camera. Only, this time it was on a casting couch, not a Calvin Klein campaign. “Started as a bottom, now we’re here…”
Here’s some of the more ‘arty/softcore’ ones. But if y’all want the FULL VIDEO of Sean Cody style shit, better CLICK HERE.
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Kris Evans – underwear model and porn star for Bel Ami – is known for being the full *ahem* package. OK, so we can’t send you his chiseled body and his broad shoulders, but you can get your hands on another (arguably, the best) piece of him. Waterproof so you can have your very own adult ‘slip ‘n’ slide’ in the shower. This dildo puts the D into detail and is certainly it’s selling point; with realistic attention from base to balls. And you get a free bottle of Vibra Lube to share with your new 6.5″ friend. GET KRIS
Having the dick of internationally famous porn star Francois Sagat, will not only make your day – it’ll make your hole weak *wink*. While it may not have as much detailing as some of the other products, it’s one of the only uncut cocks out there – and has been making Francois fans cum for the last decade! Although after getting it balls deep inside you, yours may not last as long as that… GET FRANCOIS
Popular star of Titan Men Marco Blaze burst onto the porn scene – using his girth, no doubt. With 8.5″ x 2.5″ his measurements are more impressive than Victoria Beckham’s, and it’s a bulging bargain at less than $60. Plenty of detailing means the only way we knew the difference from the real thing, is that we didn’t have to speak to him after climaxing – we just put it back in the box and said bye (for now). It comes with a handy storage bag, because you’re gonna wanna preserve this dick. GET MARCO
Molded from his very own piece, it’s your chance to spend the night, or day, or however long you can take off work, with Brent Everett’s infamous goods. With one of the most recognizable faces (among other things) in the industry, it’s no wonder Brent’s boner is fly off the shelves; selling out almost as quickly as it’ll make you cum. Thankfully it’s waterproof, because we doubt there’ll be a dry spot left in the entire house; make your experience even more authentic – and get pounded poolside, just like Everett. GET BRENT
DAMN… This one is for y’all that like it real long and deep – at 9.5″ we’re already impressed at those of you pondering fresh-faced twink Joel Birkin as your playmate. He may be one of the youngest on our list, but are you surprised he’s proving a popular choice already? You’ll be so full, you’ll never need to eat again. Skinny and satisfied – finally! Adam & Male are throwing in a free bottle of vibra glide lube too – erm, we may need more than one (bottle of lube, that is). GET JOEL
Dubbed a “blessing of Mother Nature”; we’re fairly certain you can blame an act of Mother Nature to get a day off work. And honey, at 10″ you may need it. Anybody who is familiar with the ‘work’ of Gage Weston, will be satisfied in knowing his replica model provides as much customer satisfaction as the stud does onscreen (the reviews speak for themselves). Let’s just say, there’s a reason why he’s backordered… We’d recommend storing him seperately, so that your other toys don’t get jealous. GET GAGE
Even if you’re not that into porn, there’s not doubt you’ll recognise Adam Killian – and not just because of his tattoos. Take the daddy of porn home, and use the suction-capped end for hands-free play – now that’s what we call wall art, just don’t forget to take it down before you have guests over. But it means you can really get into (or it can really get into you) while you watch the free DVD of Adam and friends. Perfect for the full fantasy… Or if you want some pointers. GET ADAM
Remember Dale Howard from Big Brother them years back? Totes hot, little bland… Well baby vanilla added some nuts and cream (and baby lotion) to mix. Who knew he had a hidden talent all those years?! The former reality star was on stage for WildBoys – and ‘wild’ is exactly what they got. Though the stage show toured back in 2012, the full extent of Dale’s antics are only coming to light! Howard donned a Baywatch get-up before dousing himself in lotion, before a chick with a surfboard revealed his lighthouse.
Now that’s far more watchable than Big Brother.
Though he never was shy about showing off, was he?
CALLING ALL THE HOT TRASHY MESSES!
*Whispers* “You’re a mess”
Glad you finally made it. Take a break from whatever party you’re at/comedown you’re dying from, and divulge on some totes-tickling memes because you deserve it hunny. People don’t give hot trashy messes enough credit, it’s hard work. So put down that baggie and have butchers…
When you start to notice the generational gap:
2. Can’t wait to cluck around like a chicken, pass out on a hag before disappearing into the bathroom with someone even trashier
3. Every Sunday of 2013
4. Can’t handle these kinds of thoughts
5. When your mum is actually a badass bitch
6. Again, ’cause mum’s are the best
7. So recognisable 
8. *Raises hand*
9. When you go a job at a totally clutch company
10. NO CAPTION NEEDED
11. Suey Tuey’s Mantra
12. OH, the mystery bumps/bags were always the best
13. Genius, but simultaneously tragic
14. Hey, who didn’t in their early twenties?
15. We all know the feeling… *Waves from Ivory Tower*
16. Appreciating the little things in life will totally change your perspective
17. “I need to get some air”
18. Every time they asked at school, we needed her picture
19. BOYFRIEND GOALS
20. And again, get you a man that can do both…
21.
22. This makes perfect sense
23. That first line is a killer…
24. OMG. Because hoe = life
25. AND FINALLY…
Isn’t it just a beautiful act of God when sportsmen accidentally expose their bits during a game? Erm… Yahh. It’s like finding a tenner in a pair of jeans that you’d forgotten about. We recently posted about Irish fighter Conor McGregor and his ‘slip’, and now we’re getting you to check out these Italians that wanna strip each other of more than just the title. How’s that for a cock-fight?
That looks more like a cock-out than a knockout to us…
DONG! DONG! DING! DING!
It’s “officially” the last day of summer (September 22nd). Now, we’re not really sure what that means in retrospect to the weather, because it makes as much sense as Rita Ora being the judge of ANTM. BUT, what we do know if that when the sun is gone – we’re gonna miss it, along with the beach days, hot boys and… well, yeah that about covers it. So here’s an entire post of mainly naked lads frolicking on the beach. Bye summer – come back soon now ya’ hear.
It’s just you see it in the movies, young star moves to Hollywood to make it big… And then there’s a bloke just casually beating his meat in the street. We know that LA is full of wankers, but that’s a bit much before our morning Starbucks. If lacklustre tugging on a floppy is his talent, we’d say that’s more Wank Of Shame than Walk Of Fame.
We recently informed you that Italy no longer criminalises public masturbation – somebody get this guy a flight!
OMGGGG
pic.twitter.com/FHNY9UbfSt
— Cocktails & Cocktalk (@cocktalkblog) September 25, 2016
Two disgraced (although, totally sexy) Spanish footballers were recently caught up in a sex scandal where they are seen getting balls deep in a unknown chica. Antonio Luna (who played briefly for Aston Villa) and Sergi Enrich who plays for Eibar, along with Luna were the pair left red-faced after the incident spread online. Ever the Einsteins, they decided to film the monumental event – but unfortunately for them – things don’t always stay secret like you’d like. Since then, the video has started to do the rounds on social media, and Enrich and Luna have issued an apology.
We haven’t read it, but imagine it goes something like, “really sorry, really immature, apologise from our hearts, didn’t mean to offend anyone, lack of judgement, yadah-yadah-yadah…” But ain’t none of y’all come here for the apology. The clip appears to show Sergi biting Antonio – which has the media have been questionning – exactly how close the pair are. Spurring a re-release of them holding hands while on holiday in New York.
Let’s keep shit real, if there wasn’t so much homophobia in sport, we’d probably be watching a really hot sex tape right now, without having to endure some beard getting in the way. Just sayin’.
Footage has emerged online claiming to be King Tommen Baratheon stroking his sceptre, with his cousin. We’ve through the grapevine that the pair were polishing their crown jewels for a girl, through the webcam chat site, Omegle. The few Twitter accounts that have posted the video, and even a couple mentioning the sexcapade have been suspended, while a couple of low-key forum sites have taken down their posts. A while we weren’t 100% sure whether it was him or not, the removal of the posts is slightly suspicious.
Some people have responded to the video, saying that the boys looks underage/or are underage – while others have intervened to state that the incident took place just recently, and that Dean-Charles Chapman is 19.
Curious? HERE’S THE LINK. Though we can’t guarantee how long it’ll be online.
Here at C&C, we’re feeling a particular slump this mid-week… And nothing perks us up like watching naked guys do something completely irrelevant to their nudity. And after, we’ve had naked pull-ups, press-ups and totally nude gym workouts, so why not bottoming for a gym ball? Did we make your day, or your hole weak?
(See what we did there?)
We’re familiar with the concept of dangerous driving in foreign countries, and you see some crazy shit in the Dominican Republic, but apparently the drivers in Iran are a little more hands on. Or so two girls discovered when they were cruising through the city’s streets, only to see only motorcyclist shifting his gear stick. Wait… Do motorcycles have gear sticks? (HINT: Nope).
Zane Pittman, who’s starred in Furious 7, Hunger Games: Mockingjay and Insurgent has found himself starring in a new role: the victim of an online nude leak. Although, his mere cameos – according to IMBD have gone uncredited – something tells us after this stint, he’ll be getting some recognition of his future projects.
The images have been drifting around Tumblr, and show the actor flaunting his ass-ets, front and back. Well, you know we love to see a full 360 here at C&C. With all of those tats, he’s giving us Alex Minsky vibes.
You know that here at C&C we love a naughty viral, but considering the name of our blog, we found this NSFW clip especially fitting. Although he’s doing a little more than talking about that cock. Next time we’re at a house party, and someone asks what we want to drink, and we say “surprise me!” perhaps, we’ll get this.
Wait for it…
Thanks, Steve.
This isn’t the first time that Alan Carr has nailed a “celeb-a-like” shoot with Heat Magazine. remember when he hilariously replicated Gaga in the Telephone video? Well the comedian is back for another parody and this time joined by rib-busting buddy David Walliams. The pair stripped off and hopped on a paddleboard to mimic the front page headlines from earlier this year that saw Orlando Bloom fully naked, accompanied by girlfriend Katy Perry.
Keith Lemon also did his best Bridget Jones:
It’s been a busy month (re: nudes) for the rugby and football players of Argentina, and Domingo Miotti is the latest sportsman to land on the list. The 20 year-old, who has been playing for the World Rugby U20 Championship (assuming that means more to you than it does us), is reportedly ready to enter the National team. Well, he looks equipped enough if you ask us.
The fly-half, who towers at 6’2″, allegedly sent the snaps via the social media app. What’s your snapcode btw? *Giggle*.
And looks like he’s carrying a whole lotta milkshake too…
The Welsh rugby player, and fitness model Stuart Reardon is widely recognised for more than just his ball skills. And after a lifetime of teasing in underwear campaigns and a sporty wet dream shoot for Gay Times, have fans finally got to see the tackle in it’s glory?
The image comes allegedly from a nude shoot with photographer Rick Day, and show no obvious signs of photoshop. Considering how comfortable he is flashing his assets, and that the other photos from the shoot weren’t exactly tame, Gay Body Blog point out they could be genuine.
The only original image is the one below, so the debate is up as to whether the bottom half is the full-lens from the shoot. Other keen viewers were quick to point out that a number of shots where Reardon is modelling extra tight briefs would back-up the fact that the photos legit. Where’s Ally McBeal when you need her?
Check them out below the rest of the pics from the Rick Day shoot:
[H/t: GetListy]
It’s one we’ve seen a few times on our feeds, but you know what? It just never gets old. We can’t imagine why.
“Jonny is gonna give him a dollar to deepthroat that banana…” – it certainly sounds like the start of a porno. And we have no idea who became the most popular cadet that year, but it certainly didn’t look like it his first time… You ain’t fooling us with that little wince, like you couldn’t do it in yo sleep. All we wanna know is where is the footage that followed.
You know, where the dom top of the squad goes “Yeah, let’s see if you can do the same with this…” *Queue awful German music*
[H/t: GetListy]
We saw a few impressive mannequin challenges over the course of the trend, notably the one that took place in the rugby player’s showers, but if you thought that was as stiff as the competition came, you’d be wrong honey. And how did we miss this? The video comes from porn stars Ryan Rose and Austin Carter on set, it must’ve been *hard* to stay stay like that for a while…
#MannequinChallenge @RyanRoseXXX & #AustinCarter @MrDimarco #GayPornMannequinChallengue pic.twitter.com/W720TWeYWG
— WreckemRyan (@KingRyanRoseXXX) December 9, 2016
[H/t: The Sword]
We’ve honestly never seen any sex appeal in Santa at all, but if he looked like that, you’d find us sitting on his lap at the Mall. Hell, we’d slave away with the elves in the workshop if that was his uniform. We’d be the ones giving him a present if he popped out of our chimney. And, er, yeah ok we’re out of sexual santa innuendos. Soz. Enjoy.
Although 2016 may have taken some of the legendary artists, right from beneath our noses, we feel blessed that they left one alone: Lisa Appleton. Who? Oh, if you haven’t heard of her, then you’re in for a treat! Lisa Appleton was a contestant on Big Brother, a whopping NINE years ago, but that hasn’t stopped the talented minx from reclaiming the headlines all these years later. Oh, and she was also on ‘Celebs on Benefits’.
Appleton has appeared heaps recently with a few signature Saturday night moves: falling over, eating phallic-shaped food and trying – albeit failing – to contain her buxom bosoms. She’s clearly banging a powerful publicist, needless to say, he must hate her…
Most of us have nipped out to throw the rubbish away in a state of undress, but boy does Lisa put us all to shame? Who says you can’t be sexy and understated at the same time? Not to mention remain glamorous doing chores… Woolen socks and lace knickers are gonna big at this year’s Victoria Secret show, FYI.
And you thought Lady and the Tramp was romantic? Check out these cosy snaps of Lisa and ‘Britain’s Worst (Wurst?) Boxer’ Robin Deakin chomping down on either end of a German sausage. We think we’ll cut away from these lovebirds before they meet in the middle…
… And I can’t even get a text back? Like a lighthouse to boats, clearly even the animal world are powerless to resist Appleton’s allure. Although, the substance residing on Lisa’ face isn’t the bird’s joy juice, but rather a result of an attack with her own Greggs eclairs. “My pastries brings all the birds to the yard…”
And we know who we’d rather have as our First Lady. Could you even imagine designers refusing to dress her? Please. Not to mention, how much fun would Trump’s inauguration be with Appleton falling off the stage and splitting her dress, while choking on a frankfurter.
Saying that you’ve never been in a taxi a little worse for wear, would be an out-and-out lie, and you know it. Fortunately, for Lisa she’s able to do it with complete dignity – well, until she kicked the driver in the back of the head and voided her bowels.
We’re all down for a bit of British patriotism. We even share memes of the Queen. But Lisa loves to take it to the next level; the former reality star showed her support (or lack of it) for the England squad. We’ve heard the fans chant “get yer tits out for the lads”, but we’re worried you’ll catch a death, dear.
Most have of us (gays, at least) have pondered the life of a mermaid at some point, but Lisa brings it to life. Daryl Hannah eat your heart out, girl. Though we’re not sure that’s what the splash is supposed to look like when you open your legs…
If anybody knows how to get into the (inebriated) Christmas spirit, it’s our Lisa. And it looks like Santa left some Bacardi in her stocking, which as you can see is a surprise to her, as she doesn’t normally drink. Hence why Santa’s Busty Helper ended up off her trolly…
It’s not like you haven’t seductively devoured a banana while making eye contact with a stranger in the Chariots hot tub. Unfortunately, those crafty paps were to capture the moment. Shouldn’t Antonio be there to feed Cleopatra the grapes?
Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s an ex-reality star speeding past on her push bike. We’ve seen some interesting sites around Croydon Whitgift Centre, but none quite like Appleton. Fortunately, she’s not too fussy when it comes to sausage gobbling – when you can’t get a Bratwurst, a Richmond will have to do…
Random rendevous’ happen a lot when you hit the bottle, and if anyone knows that, it’s Lisa. Throwing her real fur coat to the side, with total disregard, her lover can barely keep his hands off her. Onlookers originally thought the pair were sharing a sloppy kebab, but it turns out they’d just got to third base.
The post 12 Times Living Legend Lisa Appleton was Totally Your Spirit Animal appeared first on Cocktails & Cocktalk.
